Not Enough/I am Enough

Do you ever feel like you are just not enough?

 

I’m a Type A personality. I am pretty OCD about most things.

 

I am usually my own worst enemy.

 

I often feel like what I’m doing doesn’t matter. That it isn’t enough. It’s not as nice as it should be. It’s not as clean as it should be. It’s not perfect.

 

I’ve felt that staying at home doesn’t always matter. The daily monotony of laundry, dishes, and discipline just aren’t enough. I should be out saving the world! I should be doing more.

 

I should be more.

 

I have let these feelings rule over my home many times.

 

I have sacrificed my personal sanity and enjoyment so that everything could be just so.

 

This week, I have read a number of articles talking about moms just being moms.

{Having Babies in Opposite World}

{Parenting a Wild Child}

And they have spoken directly to my heart.

 

I am enough at this phase in my life.

 

I cannot compare my present day to someone else’s because my challenges and triumphs aren’t exactly like anyone else’s.

 

It’s ok to take a break and love on my kids.. isn’t that the purpose of being a stay at home mom?

 

It’s ok to miss a shower because the baby needed to be held.

 

It’s ok that there are extra dirty dishes.

 

It’s ok that the laundry pile is out of control.

 

It’s ok that there is a pile of craft supplies to do with the kids that haven’t happened yet.

 

I am still enough.

 

Being so worried about living up to my own ideas of perfection robs me of joy. It discounts the plan that God has for my life and the joy that He has given me to be a mama.

 

My children are a blessing. God has entrusted them to me. He gave them to me because He knew that I was equipped for this job, even when I feel like I am falling short.

 

Today I am blessed to be a mama.

 

Today I am enough.

About Layne Quintanilla

I'm a Child of God, wife, frugal home school mama, and blogger. Living each day intentionally & full of joy!

8 Responses to Not Enough/I am Enough

  1. Sylvia Zajis May 3, 2013 at 2:18 am #

    I really needed to read this today. It is my 36th birthday today and I am feeling inadequate. I often do. I am also an A type personality with more hope of accomplishment than one person can achieve in a short lifetime. I need to remind myself it is okay to be human more often. Thank you.

    • Layne Quintanilla May 4, 2013 at 9:54 pm #

      Happy birthday, Sylvia! I hope you were able to enjoy your birthday and realize that you’re a beautiful creation in Him! Thank you for stopping by!

  2. Beanybopp May 3, 2013 at 8:48 am #

    I hear yeah! Im my worst enemy also. I do have anxiety with some OCD (they tech go hand in hand) and I am nuts about cleaning. My husband doesn’t get it (I don’t think any really do) lol I have gotten a little better since having our son but I’m still pretty bad and I think part of that is also wanting everything nice for my husband when he gets home from a hard days work. I know that he doesn’t care if dishes are still in the sink but I do lol

    • Layne Quintanilla May 4, 2013 at 9:52 pm #

      Haha.. YES! Dishes in the sink are my enemy! I hope you are able to relax a little and work on letting things go! It’s a hard lesson for us OCD people! 🙂

  3. amanda May 6, 2013 at 8:41 pm #

    Yes I feel this way all the time. One of my struggles is being personal on my blog which is why I started blogging and it never happened. And every week I say I’m going to ‘dive right in’. Epic fail!

    • Layne Quintanilla May 7, 2013 at 12:10 am #

      It’s not an epic fail. It’s life where you are right now. I know that a few years from now, we’ll look back and miss the crazy moments of today. At least, that’s what I try to remember when the days seem overwhelming! 😉 Thanks for stopping by, Amanda!

  4. Jenn July 19, 2013 at 6:50 pm #

    You know I needed to read this! <3

    • Layne Quintanilla July 19, 2013 at 11:28 pm #

      🙂 Thanks for always being by my side! So blessed by you ♥